Changes, Happenings & Updates

Saturday, May 3, 2014

Bye April » Hello May

- Sorry if this shows up in your timeline twice...I was thought I hit preview but hit publish yesterday when I started it! - 

Hello friends. I thought today I would try to get things a little back to normal around here. Its been a few days since I have done anything online. I just took a little time off to get my head together so I thought I would share some thoughts with you all. 

* I stopped vlogging for the most part. There are a couple of reasons. Honestly, it just wasn't that fun anymore. I would video on and off though out the day and then stay up late trying to get it edited, saved and uploaded. Then I would have a bunch mean comments about it causing me to get sad and or depressed... which I know came out on Scott and Jackson. So I am done. BUT...there is a bright side. :) I am going to vlog here and there.. Maybe a shopping vlog, or travel vlog...along with other videos that I will be putting up on that channel but the really personal stuff... is gone. I will not be vlogging daily but I will still be making content to put on that channel. It just started feeling like a danger zone and most of the time I totally run from situations like that. I did it for 6 months straight. Its time for a break. I will start videos on that channel Sunday with a video explaining changes are to come and what videos to expect. 

* Nothing will happen to my main youtube channel and I will be making my normal videos. And nothing will happen to this blog. This blog has always been my first love and it will remain up for a very long time. My best friend and sister in law reminded me....when you delete it.. its gone for good. So Instead of doing that, I just took a short break. 

* I have been struggling with depression and honestly anxiety issues for a while. I know people have the right to judge me/my family, because I put it out there. Well.. that's done. I am going to be limiting a lot from this point on. For whatever reason, my hands have started shaking, my legs tremble which are all reasons to slow down and focus on other things. Honestly, I feel broken right now so I am trying to deal with that first. 

* All this online communication from blogging, youtube, vlogging was suppose to be fun. And here lately, I found its not so fun anymore ( really in terms of the vlogging. ). The past few days I have been loving not having a camera in my hand every minute. 

* I have really been reflecting on what I have been feeling and ended up putting my entire family in counseling. In fact, we already went to our first appointment. :) I told you.. changes are happening! Its just kinda time for a tune up of sorts so since we hold our relationships very high...its time we focus on them. 

* In terms of my personal facebook page... if I don't know or remember you personally, your gone but anyone is welcome to follow my Facebook fan page. There are a ton of people I don't know or who I don't remember on my main fb page and I don't see why they need a peak into my life. 

* Tomorrow is my moms BIRTHDAY! I have to admit, we don't always see eye to eye on things. My mom is a mom who doesn't like me cursing.. who wants my hair different...to sit up straight.. but is also the person I trust more than anyone on the planet. Trust is not easy for me but she's amazing. She wanted a electric kettle like the one I have, so that is what I got her! :) She already knows. Its never easy shopping for my mom so when I saw she loved the red kettle in my kitchen, I asked her if she wanted one for her birthday and it was a big yessssssssssssss! PERFECT! No more guessing what to get her! Anyway, I am blessed because of her. 

* For the most part this summer is going to be kid free. They are all growing up so fast and have their own lives so I think Scott and myself are going to use that time to our full advantage and focus on our marriage. After 10 years we have a lot of things to sort out. And I have always believed that you have to put your marriage above the kids. If we are not together or fighting all the time, it will not help them so we are going to take that time to just kinda focus on each other. I am sure going to miss them though. They will still be coming but it will only be for a couple of weeks towards the end. 

* Not only are we focusing on our family more but we have a golden retriever who is almost 8 years old starting to face health problems of his own. I have a feeling a lot of our time is also going to be focused on him. 

* I had a wonderful visit with my mom and sister but kinda happy to get back to our normal routine. We had a ton of family pictures taken together which I should have up in a few days. The park we went to take the pictures, was so pretty. I think we are going to load Super Cooper up and let him go have some fun too! 

* The beginning of the week was kinda gloomy but I am going to take the rest of today and this weekend to try to get the house back in order. There is a ton to do and I am just not moving that fast. 

* My ribs are feeling much better except its still impossible to sleep comfortably. Thank God for sleep meds is all I can say. 

* I scheduled Scott and I a couples massage. We are not going for a couple of weeks just to make sure it wont hurt me but its going to be so nice. The last couples massage we had was on the beach in Mexico. I wish I could close my eyes and go back there... this very minute. I can still smell the salty air when I close my eyes and think about it. 

* The weather here has been amazing. Simply beautiful and I have been loving every minute of it. 

* We all went to our local Spring Fling last night. I think the coolest thing was...the bikers. They were all racing around the city....and I was waiting for Lance Armstrong! Ha! Jackson ended up zip lining and loved it. Who would have guessed!





* Back home, today I would be heading to the Kentucky Derby today. Maybe its a good thing because I never pick fast horses! I would probably be loosing money but I do miss the big hats and the beautiful horses. A lot of my friends are going on with the party though and it's going to be one wild night!


* I went to the grocery store the other day. It was so strange coming home and putting things up and not recording anything. I know our " Typical American Diet " doesn't always make others happy but I did miss sharing it with you! I will have another one up in a few days. Our schedule is so messed up right now.

* Scott took my car to the dealership today to get it cleaned up for me. I didn't even think about not being able to run a convertible through those automatic car washes. Glad I checked with him before I did it! So today my cute little lady bug got cleaned up and I couldn't be more thankful! Plus one of my fuses went out and the pug ins didn't work. So that is now fixed and my phone charger will work. Thank you Scott. And you guys should know.. I have started wearing my seat belt while driving. That wreck scared me and with this car being a convertible, I think I need to wear it.

* The flowers are looking amazing. I think I am going to do another garden haul soon. My mom bought me this beautiful knock out rose that I have to get planted...probably today. I have to admit.. I do really like the weather here in South Carolina. I don't know why I like it here so much better than North Carolina but I do. We had 1 snow this past winter which is pretty good considering all the cold weather that was dumped on the US this year. Flowers are such a welcoming change of the season. 

* Last night while were at that festival I don't think Scott liked that I was not recording and taking picture after picture. So he broke out his phone and started recording and taking pictures on his own. To be very honest, my husband loves the blog and youtube channels. He really does. I don't think he's crazy about me not vlogging anymore because he mentioned it more than once. But I know I was taking out the negative comments on him and probably Jackson too. And lets face it.. most of the hate is coming from the vlogs. I don't really read the sites and mean ass comments much anymore but it hurt. I am not going to lie. Most of the time, people are so nice. But I am already broken in a sense and it wasn't helping. I am human and I do have feelings. Who knows.. Scott could start vlogging next! ( Just kidding! ) But he does miss it and its nice to know that he is so supportive in this blog and my youtube channels. 

* This time next week we will be in Indiana. As I said.. I intend vlogging while I am there some but I am so excited to see the kids! Laura.. Scott's oldest is graduating college and I am so proud of her. I swear, she is the cutest kid of the bunch! I adore her and I am so happy she is doing great but guess what!? 

We are going to be grandparents again!!! Laura is expecting her 3rd child. It was kinda shocking to say the least because her plate is already full but... we are so happy for her. It was so sweet when she told me. She something like..  - My marriage is working out getting stronger - I am graduating from college and going to have a real career - and I have another baby on the way! She was sooooo freaking excited that I could feel it all the way here in South Carolina! :) We love you Laura! 
* Speaking of babies...we are not done! ( Yea.. don't get too excited.. I am not pregnant! haahaha! )  - Scott neice Vicki is also expecting! 

Babies are in the air in our family! The older kids are moving on with their lives and growing up on us. Vicki was young when I came into her family and seeing her getting ready to have a baby just reminds me that the clock has been ticking the entire time. I feel old! :) But even though I am done with babies, our family is growing. A few years back.. I lost almost the entire side of my dads family. Poof..here one minute and gone the next. Well, I don't think my life is just about them anymore. I still have a family that is growing and growing. ♥ And just as these babies are growing up our littlest Brittany, Jackson and Zane will start driving. God help us. Life is full of changes. 
Things to do this weekend:

* Start getting the house cleaned up...
* Walk the dog. We are so worried about him. He is looking old and its hard for him to get up and down so we think maybe walks and more exercise will be good for his hips.
* Work in my planner. I just haven't been keeping up.
* Maybe go on a picnic - the weather is so pretty.
* Bake some amazing brownies.
* Clean the chalkboard wall
* Groom the cats. Warmer weather is here and I want to cut them down some to be more comfortable.
* Check the PO Box


I just want to say thank you for all the love and support you guys have given me. Monday, things happened beyond my control that made me question everything. I am still learning how to get through the hard times in life but I do fall short many times. I have a quick temper and I am far from perfect or glamorous. In fact, none of us in my family are glamorous but we do try and I appreciate all the kind emails and comments. I am going to try to get things back to normal with the videos on my main channel and we will see what happens with the other one in time. As for this blog, I will continue with this blog, freebies, and linkups. I had to post that free pet id tag because I know so many of you guys have pets so leave it to a free sample I want to share to come back to blogging! :)

xoxo



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