Friday, September 23, 2016

Friday Letters ♥


Hello friends! I hope you are having a great friday. Since I am doing my best to get back with it...I thought another edition of Friday letters would be fun. Hope you enjoy! 

Dear God, I have had a lot of questions for you since my divorce and the death of my grandmother. I'm not mad but I wish you wouldn't have taken her from me. I understand the man. I asked for help getting away from him but I wish I still had my grandmother here. I hope she is singing with the angles now. Please hear my prayers and help put forgiveness in my heart for those who have and continue to do harm to me. 

Dear Brittany, Jackson, & Jordan, You are the best things that have ever came from me. Each of you are better than me and I am so privileged to that you call me mom. I am so proud of you. 

Dear Gabby, I am sorry you seem to miss your friends/family. I miss them too. I promise to change it as soon as we get moved. 

Dear Mom, I am so proud of you for getting through everything with grandma. I can't imagine that day coming for Laci and I. I would be soooooo lost without you. I love you mom. 

Dear Brangelina, Talk about shocking. Oddly enough I don't feel so bad about my divorce now. If you two big money Hollywood actors with a tribe of kids cant make it work.....who were we? All hope is lost.

Dear Laura, I hope you know that you are someone I truly adore. Remember everything I said when I was sitting in your kitchen last night. I really do think it could be the answer to a lot of our problems. I love you and we can figure out things together. You are not alone.....and never will be. 

Dear Camper, I am very thankful for a place to call my own for the time being. You have kept me warm and helped keep me safe while I have tried to deal with a broken heart, a new job, a new way of life and I appreciate it. But I am ready to move. Hopefully we will only be together a little bit longer. But I will miss the bed!!! The bed is the most comfortable bed I have ever slept in. Strange but true! And guess what? No work today means....time to clean you up. 

Dear Shanna, Thank you best friend for putting up with me. I love you. 

Dear Cherokee Park, I love you. I love you. I love you. I forgot how much I truly adore the space you take up and share with the with the community. I keep walking, searching and discovering new places that capture my mind, heart and soul. Who knew a park could do so much. 

Dear BGT8IRD, I am doing my best to not hate you. But really it's too late. YOU are one of the worst people on the planet and now I understand why that ex of mine is so screwed up. I wish nothing but the worst for you however, I am trying to get past those feelings so I will just pray for you. 

Dear Hair, I am doing my best to grow you out but you are getting on my nerves so badly! You also need dyed. Yep...thanks grey hairs! 

Dear Dad, I guess from the other side you can see everything that has happened. I wish you were here. I wish I could talk to you and actually hear your words back. I hope you are proud of me for not letting a man destroy me. It took a lot of previous lessons...and talks from you. I am stronger than I know and I still have those words from you flowing through my head. I love you and I will forever. 

Dear Blog, I have missed you so much. It feels amazing to be back where I belong. 

Dear Laci, I was very happy that you came up here this week. It was nice seeing you and I know mom appreciated it. I know you were not around many people up here but they are your family and they love you. I'll call soon. 

Dear Russell, Thank you for being here in such a crazy time. You know I love you. 

Dear Waffle House, I will see you soon but I think our time is about over. I am so grateful for the time and support you have given me. But better things are ahead.....and I need more money. I think I will miss my friends more than anything else. This is probably our last week together. :(  I am scared of a new job.....but I have to face those fears and get some real money made. 

Dear Mini Cooper, I guess we are not meant to be together forever. Another change in the air. It will feel good to move and not worry anymore. 

Dear Romeo, I miss you kitty cat. I truly do. I am sorry you were not the one who came with me. I thought I would take the one who needed me the most. Not the one I needed the most. My heart breaks everytime I wake up and don't see your cute face! 

Dear Body, I guess a divorce is doing you well. I have lost almost 12 pounds. With the new job in the future, I bet I loose much more. But could you please sleep better and stop with the hip and ankle hurting so much. 

Dear Kimmy, I am so thankful for all the love and support you have shown. I love you like a sister. And I will forever be grateful for everything you have done for me. 

Dear Bakery, Relying on Trina to tell you the truth is about as stupid as it gets. That's why I feel compelled to come on and tell you the truth. Get it right otherwise you will just look like dumbasses. 

Dear Buddy ( But NOT Joseph ), I should have said this years ago....but I am done. Like seriously done. Your mother loved you so much. You should have been there and you seriously cost yourself some family with your antics the last few days. It wasn't about you. It was about honoring your mother for 2 days. Do you think it was easy for any of us? Do you think we really wanted to be there? It hurt terribly but it was about honoring her life. People have made excuses for you for your entire life. There is nothing you can say that can fix this. You should be ashamed of yourself. Goodbye and Good Riddance. 

Dear Catherine, I'm sorry. I couldn't love him enough clearly. Our family became disposable to him. I thought I was a good wife. Guess not. It's just a title either of us held well. Sorry for what I said about Trina but sometimes she is just too much for any one person. I miss you and I will always love you.

Dear Phone, I broke you. Dropped you in water. Lost you.....and you are still hanging on. Please hang on a little longer and I will let you retire soon! 

Dear EXHusband, You are one of the biggest disappointments in my life. But you didn't destroy me. 

Dear Entire Martin Family, You guys really are some of the most loyal loving family a girl could ask for. Coming together for grandma, I saw love and kindness. I saw sadness. I am sorry for what my father's side of the family said and done to you guys. You are the loyal ones and I love you so much. I really do. You have lifted me up and cared for me in one of the hardest times of my life. You are my family. 

Dear Blog/Youtube Friends, Thank you guys for sticking around and for being so understanding. Things have really changed. I still have a lot that I need to get done/updated but I feel good about being here again talking with all of you. I love you guys.  See ya soon. xx

3 comments:

  1. I am so glad you bounced back from everything and reopened your blog. Your perseverance is so inspiring! I hope and pray you are now on the upswing of your life! After rock bottom its only up from here right?

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  2. God bless you and I am so happy you all got out safe. Sorry for those who were hurt. Keep your head high,we miss you on YouTube. You can do this.

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  3. Praying for you

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